How to Love by Katie Cotugno

How to Love by Katie Cotugno

Overall Rating: 4/5

Quality of Prose: 4/5

Quality of Story: 4/5

Quality of Characters: 4/5

Ability to Make the Audience Think/Feel Differently: 3/5

How Long It Took Me to Finish: 2 days

A 1 Sentence Summary

Three years after the love (or obsession) of Reena’s life, Sawyer LaGrande, abandoned her and left her pregnant and alone at 16, Sawyer returns to the town, girl, and family he left behind.

My Favorite Quotes

“I wasn’t shy, exactly…I just didn’t know how to do this, is all, the clang and chatter of high school. And, more than that, I didn’t particularly want to learn…I wasn’t unpopular, exactly. I was just…unequipped.”

“The hideous thing is this: I want to forgive him. Even after everything, I do. A baby before my 17th birthday and a future as lonely as the surface of the moon and still the sight of him feels like a homecoming, like a song I used to know but somehow forgot.”

“I am remembering so clearly how he looked when he was eight, when he was eleven, when he was seventeen. Sawyer and I were only together for a few months before he left, but he was my golden boy for so long before that he would have taken the guts of me with him even if we’d never been a couple at all.”

“My whole life a holding pattern, some variation on wait and see.”

how to love

What I Loved About It

I’m not gonna lie: I did not have very high expectations from this book. I got it for free at a book fair type thing at my school and had heard from a colleague that a lot of her students loved it. So I assumed it’d be one of those books teen girls who don’t like to read like but that lacks depth. I’ve never been so happy to be proven wrong.

Catugno’s prose is exactly the kind I like, poignant and beautiful. Her prose (and really the entire book itself) reminded me of Sarah Dessen (who, as you probably already know, is one of my favorite YA coming of age/romance authors). Both of her lead characters in this book are interesting but flawed, and the romance between them is electric and sweet, and yet so dang full of angst. (Again, just how I like my YA romances.)

I think what also made me really love this book was how much I related to the protagonist, Reena. While I can’t really relate to the whole falling-in-dangerous-love-with-the-bad-boy thing (though my sixteen year old self would have really wanted to) or the pregnant-at-sixteen thing, I can certainly relate to her loneliness, her high school-related social ineptitude, and her great desire to escape. I thought Catugno, like Queen Sarah Dessen, did a really good job depicting that kind of character.

My main hang-up with this book though is the lack of importance Reena and Sawyer’s baby Hannah had in the story. After his return, Sawyer was completely focused on getting Reena back. There never once was a conversation about him wanting to know his child or him despairing about missing the first two years of her life. While Reena seems to be a decent mother off-the-page, the book doesn’t actually give any evidence that she is a good mother on-the-page. The book is a love story. It focuses on Reena’s feelings about her abandonment and how trapped she feels, how much she feels like her life is over. It’s a coming of age story, with a teen pregnancy thrown in for extra drama, not a story about a mother. While I liked the book this way, I also felt like something was missing because of this.

What My Students Could Learn From It

There aren’t a ton of lessons students could learn from this novel. I do think, however, that it’s a good chronicle of the coming-of-age experience. It shows teen readers that life doesn’t always go the way you planned, that your decisions have consequences, and that you should never forget yourself because of a boy (or a girl, for that matter). And, of course, it’s a book that could teach kids that reading can be fun. And that is one of the most important lessons I want students in my care to learn.